On the First Anniversary of 'A Grandparent's Grief'

While cleaning my bathroom last week, a cardinal squawked at me from the little tree outside my window.  I looked out and there he was ... apparently yelling at me.  What?  What do you want?  What do you need me to do?  And as quickly as the beautiful, red bird appeared, he was gone. 

The next day, as I was starting to log off my computer, I briefly noticed a headline that included the phrase 'grief is not a journey'.  At a brief glance, the indication was that the author is a tad annoyed that the days, months and years following the death of a loved one is commonly referred to as a 'journey'.  I was in a hurry to get to an appointment, so  made a mental note that this was an article I wanted to revisit.   If this time we spend following the death of our loved one isn't a 'journey', then what what does the author call it, I wondered?  How does he/she describe it?  My curiosity was piqued.

Later that evening when I went back to read the piece, I couldn't find it.  I'd been so rushed to get to my appointment, that I didn't make note of the source.  There were only one or two places I could have seen it, so it was frustrating not being able to locate the rant.  Either I missed it or perhaps the writer decided it was too bold-sounding and  deleted it.  So, just as quickly as the cardinal had come and gone the day before, this article was not to be found.

Both the bird and the lost headline have been on my mind.  What was their message and why do they egg me on, prod me to keep thinking about them?

After three days of reflection, I think I've figured it out.  Tomorrow marks the  anniversary of my first blog post.  When I started writing last year, the purpose was - and still is - to provide a comforting place for bereaved grandparents.  My goals?  To share resources, provide support, offer a forum that enables those of us who have lost a grandchild to express our experiences, ideas, thoughts, feelings and inspirations.  And, yes, I need to pen my story.  Expression moves me along my grief journey at a fulfilling pace.

In evaluating these goals and purpose over the past 12 months, I feel that my story is current, sharing and support are available and the resource page is filling in quite nicely.  But there is more to ponder, more to experience and much more to write.  The idea that grief is not a 'journey' has provided inspiration for a future post topic and the cardinal's squawking pushes me to examine the subject further.  I am reminded that there is no right or wrong in the realm of grief.  What I may term a 'journey' in a figurative sense, someone else may take very literally.

The bird and that word 'journey' also encourage me to forge forward, to continue to write, to squawk at myself when I need motivation in order to keep moving ahead on my personal grief path.  I look forward to what the next year brings for 'A Grandparent's Grief'.

Thanks to all of you who read along and keep me blogging.  You inspire me and I am grateful.